This is the Mood Rocking Bed from Fab. It’s a real bed, and they’re available from $ 2,835 (for a full) to $ 3,665 (for a king). They also sell a twin for $ 1,665, but come on, nobody’s sleeping in a twin. “What about kids?” They don’t need $ 1,700 beds, that’s what. I slept on the floor in a sleeping bag until I was 13. And you know what? I did it from 15 to 30 too, after experimenting with a hammock for a year. Also, who sleeps in the middle of a field like that? Because if I wake up to a cow trying to eat my covers I’m gonna be pissed. No, no I’m not. I’m gonna think I’m in Oz or something. “The prison?” Yeah, the prison, dummy. God I should shank you so hard right now. Hey — have you ever wanted to be having sex, but then, instead of climaxing, puking instead? Well that’s what this bed is for. Alternatively, have sex in a rowboat. Just saying, I saw two counselors do it at summer camp once! Then Jason killed them. BOOM — Friday the 13th tie-in, count it.
Hit the jump for another shot in case you were wondering what the bed might look like in your unfinished garage.
